What's A Win For You?

by Caryl Teh

What’s a win for you — financially, professionally, relationally, or in any other area of your life? What’s the defining moment at which you feel like you’ve achieved a goal, accomplished a mission, or made progress?

“I’ve never even thought about defining my wins. Why should I?” Because working through each day with no set “win” is like running a race without a finish line. You need to give yourself small checkpoints to look forward to, high fives along the way to keep your spirit up, moments in the race when you can assure yourself that “Yes, I have accomplished something! Now I can take a deep breath, relax a little and take a break before continuing.”

In fact, short dopamine hits in the form of likes and comments on your social media posts are exactly how companies like Facebook, Twitter and Instagram keep you coming back to their platform.

So here’s a suggested framework to think through and decide your wins:

Specify the area of life
Set your long-term goal
Write the motivations or reasons to remind yourself of why you’ve set this particular goal
Define your “wins”

Here’s an example:

Area of life	Big Picture Goal	Underlying Motivation	Wins Along The Way
Physical health	Stay fit even from home!	Besides feeling healthy and looking good, my physical fitness affects my mental ability to focus and do well in my work. Staying fit will help me feel better overall!	1. Walk 10, 000 steps every day. 2. Eat a fruit a day. 3. Get 7 hours of sleep every night. 4. Exercise at least 3 times a week. 5. No phone time in bed.
Mental health	Know how to handle my thoughts, worries and emotions	Thoughts, worries and emotions can cloud my judgment. But if I better understand myself — ie. how those affect me — I will be able to make better and wiser decisions with a clearer mind.	1. Tell yourself “It’s ok to not feel ok. I just need to be more aware of why I feel this way, how it affects me, and what I can do to handle it better.” 2. Have a shit list to help you let go of things that have bothered you today. 3. List 3 things you’re grateful for at the end of each day.
Work	Keep looking for ways to be better at what you do!	What I do matters – not just to myself, but also to my team. Every challenge or problem is a potential learning point.	1. Create a to-do list. This will help keep you on task for the day. Over time, you will improve at estimating the time taken to complete a given task. 2. Communication is key! Know that it’s ok to ask for help when you aren’t sure or feel overwhelmed. 3. Participate actively in team-building activities or initiatives – we’re stronger together! It’s a great avenue to get to know your colleagues better – how they think and communicate, or simply other quirks that make them unique.
Social (parents, siblings and friends)	Don’t take my relationships for granted! Keep building them.	One of the most common regrets humans have is that they didn’t appreciate their friendships or family relationships as much as they should have. Relationships add so much value to my life and remind me of my worth in a wider community outside myself.	Be intentional – set aside time to catch up. 1. Share a meal, in person if possible, at least once a month. 2. If you can’t meet together, do a video or voice call. 3. Drop them a message whenever you think of them – it could just be a simple “How are you”, or “Thank you for… ”, or “This video / heard this song that made me think of you. I think you’ll like it!”
Finances	Manage my finances well	Learning how to manage money is part of becoming more mature: I need to learn to prioritise and be responsible.	1. Create a budget – prioritise bills first, decide on a percentage you want to save with your monthly salary, but also don’t forget to set aside some money to reward yourself with a special treat every now and then! 2. If you find the budget unsuited to your lifestyle, consider adjusting it. 3. Explore ways to invest, but make sure this doesn’t consume you!
Fun	Keep learning more about myself	I may have hidden talents or things I enjoy that I didn’t know about.	1. Set aside time every week to simply have fun. 2. Maybe learn a new skill or language over a set period of time. There are so many free online learning platforms now – you have abundant opportunities at your fingertips!

You are unique! We hope this framework will help you to find more meaning in your day-to-day, and assure you that who you are and what you do matters. Now go on, you’ve got some winning to do!